I’ve always felt 16 so my age is always horrifying for me, especially as I pass big ones. For some reason this last one was really hard for me. I’m 45!!! For some reason it makes me feel like I should have done more with my life. Like I should be emotionally more mature. I’m not though so what am I gonna do? Fret on my birthday then move on I suppose.
My BFF is the most remarkable person I know. We met playing a game called Everquest. Little did we know us two adorable rogues would become best friends. We played together every day then hubby and I moved on to another game. I had made friends in games before and usually when we moved to another game we just lost track of the other people and that was that.
Something was different with this because without really planning to we reconnected. it’s been about 12ish years.
We have never met face to face and only talked on the phone a couple of times. We spend most of our time talking to one another on an Instant Messenger and we are remarkably similar. We are both Bipolar and we also have similar personalities.
She is a wonderful supporter who is not afraid to call me on my bullshit. Even my husband won’t do that. I like to call her my other other half. lol.
She is strong and beautiful and smart and funny and honestly one of the best people I have ever met in my entire life. I love her with all my heart and nothing could ever change that.
I trust her with my life.
I always believed that when I was all grown up I would never want for anything. I could eat anything that I wanted. I could go into the stores and request any item of any price and it would be mine.
Little did I know that there would be days where I was hungry. Times when all I could do of was dream of having the simplistic comforts.
At this point in my life, things are better and I have what a lot of people call first world problems. Took me a long time to reach this point but honestly I think life is better than I could have ever imagined.
When I have things to do, things that can wait. In reality everyting can wait can’t it? I nap!
I love to close my eyes and dream of the future and the past, even the nightmares are more entertaining then the mundane tasks that I put aside for that warm feeling of sleep.
Sure I could be living life, but I’d rather just close my eyes and be where things are more vivid and vibrant and not at all boring or taxing.
If I were fearless I’d explore the world. Nothing would stop me, not heights or bugs or germs and people. Animals would seem like nothing but bundles of cute to me and I wouldn’t fear quenching my thirst from local sources.
I’d write a book and paint plenty of art not caring if others liked them or not. I wouldn’t fear failure in the things that I did. I could accomplish anything because I would believe in myself and not be afraid of trying and learning.
I would be a whole person. I would have friends and foes and acquaintances too. I’d be the life of the party without the need for alcohol or weed. ( like I can find weed in Omaha anyhow ).
I’d wear what I wanted not caring what others thought and feeling good because I am being me instead of what society thinks I should be.
I would try out a lot more foods. Instead of sticking with the things that make me comfortable I would dabble and nibble and try something new any chance I could get.
I would be amazing if I had no fear..
Sploonk goes the fire work as it exits it’s casing
Kablam it exits flying into the air,
Flips hit sparkles flying out like diamonds,
Boom it explodes making us cower.
Fireworks are exciting and pretty and wonderful. Ya I like em.
I had to think long and hard about this as I really enjoy my flavors.
At first I thought that I might give up sweet. Maybe it would help with all those cravings allowing me to finally lose weight. I only am gonna live once though and I love me some pie. I want to eat a piece of pie in every single state after all.
Then I thought about getting rid of spice, at least the heat part. I don’t handle it very well but thy put it in some of the most flavorful foods. Yet I do like the little high I get I when I eat a number 7 pad thai.
So I decided that I would give up bitter, it’s really everything I hate. It ruins beers and wines, makes a lot of vegetables inedible ruins even some meats.
So get rid of bitter, I eat more veggies and meat and maybe skip the sweets once in a while. Who knows it could really change the taste of everything.