My BFF is the most remarkable person I know. We met playing a game called Everquest. Little did we know us two adorable rogues would become best friends. We played together every day then hubby and I moved on to another game. I had made friends in games before and usually when we moved to another game we just lost track of the other people and that was that.
Something was different with this because without really planning to we reconnected. it’s been about 12ish years.
We have never met face to face and only talked on the phone a couple of times. We spend most of our time talking to one another on an Instant Messenger and we are remarkably similar. We are both Bipolar and we also have similar personalities.
She is a wonderful supporter who is not afraid to call me on my bullshit. Even my husband won’t do that. I like to call her my other other half. lol.
She is strong and beautiful and smart and funny and honestly one of the best people I have ever met in my entire life. I love her with all my heart and nothing could ever change that.
I trust her with my life.
Striking a match Jenni looked over her shoulder one final time at the house she and her husband had called home for the past several years. As she leaned forward to catch the gasoline aflame she smile once more before picking up her various pieces of luggage and throwing them in her car.
She hummed quietly as she drove away thinking about the new life she was starting for herself. An explosion filled the air as she drove away and quietly patted the open cooler beside her.
Looking inside she grinned to herself as she remembered tearing her husbands chest apart with the tree clippers. She knew she would never have to worry. She laughed as she said to herself “Home is where the heart is!”
You should think with your heart,
Yet you think with your head.
You should be living a life,
Yet you walk around half dead.
We are what we make ourselves isn’t that right?
So why do we keep hiding ourselves from the light?
Being Positive is hard it’s true,
Yet we know our strengths and what we’ve been through.
You’re strong and empowered and funny and kind,
Anyone who doesn’t see it deserves to be left behind.
Look in the mirror and say I love you,
Your beauty is boundless and your heart is true.
Be Positive in each step that you take,
The feelings you grow will never be fake.
Positivity is power and power is truth,
Bring forth an emotional fountain of youth.
Your the best, your the tops, you’re your #1,
Thank goodness for that cause this poem is all done.
When I was growing up I looked at people probably more clinically then most. I didn’t trust anyone. I was hurt plenty and often. I made poor choices in friends and dates. I chose them completely on looks or things that they were involved in. I wanted to get married and be rich, I didn’t want to be poor anymore. I wanted pretty people around me because if they were pretty then so was I. I was great at choosing people who were ugly inside. I never followed my heart about a person. In fact if I felt anything remotely close to caring about someone who wouldn’t fit into these things I idealized I quickly and harshly ended it. Man I was stupid.
I wish I had of been told to just follow my heart. I would have likely had better quality relationships both with friends and the people I dated. I possibly would have more active friendships now. I say possibly cause of the whole crazy thang.
My husband was the first time I followed my heart and that worked out better than I ever imagined.
Thank you for supporting me through all my crazy. The anxiety, the bipolarity, the insecurities and rash behaviors associated with my borderline personality disorder. Thank you for staying home with me when I just couldn’t leave and then hopping up and going out when I felt I could. You’ve never complained and always stood by my side, showing me more love than I ever thought I deserved. Thank you for keeping me alive.