Always Sixteen

Age-Old Questions

I’ve always felt 16 so my age is always horrifying for me, especially as I pass big ones. For some reason this last one was really hard for me. I’m 45!!! For some reason it makes me feel like I should have done more with my life. Like I should be emotionally more mature. I’m not though so what am I gonna do? Fret on my birthday then move on I suppose.

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Money Growing On Trees

Adult Visions

I always believed that when I was all grown up I would never want for anything. I could eat anything that I wanted. I could go into the stores and request any item of any price and it would be mine.

Little did I know that there would be days where I was hungry. Times when all I could do of was dream of having the simplistic comforts.

At this point in my life, things are better and I have what a lot of people call first world problems. Took me a long time to reach this point but honestly I think life is better than I could have ever imagined.

The Realm of Dreams

Now? Later!

When I have things to do, things that can wait. In reality everyting can wait can’t it? I nap!

I love to close my eyes and dream of the future and the past, even the nightmares are more entertaining then the mundane tasks that I put aside for that warm feeling of sleep.

Sure I could be living life, but I’d rather just close my eyes and be where things are more vivid and vibrant and not at all boring or taxing.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

So Fragile

Life is fragile. Humans are born vulnerable physically to predators and illness born in the air. Birds can barely move their heads and have no feathers. Many animals are born blind in the beginning. Plants are easily stepped on, especially their fragile shoots. Everything about life is just so easily ruined at the whim of others or nature.

I’m fragile. Easily broken and torn apart. My scars and wounds slow to mend. My mind barely holding on to sanity on some days, a fragility of it’s own.

Fragile.